bemyheroine
I'm dancing in the room as I would in the woods with you | ||||||||
I'm waking up, and I see the world again.
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Sunday, November 23, 2008, 7:31 PM
Podium.
So let's see. have you ever thought of all the possibilities? all the different things that could happen. It'll be pretty damn amazing if life went the way I want it to... But hey, I'm not complaining really. I'm just... reminiscing, contemplating.... thinking. So I'm sorry for my endless rants. It's been a while. Don't think anything of it... It's just... thoughts. --------------------------------------------------------- Have you ever wondered what it would be like if there were us? If you didn't end up falling for her? Why? Why did you lie to me in the first place? Or are you just as fickle as you seem. I always thought that everyone had two different sides. That if you dig deep enough, if you scratch the surface off, you'll find it. Find it deep down inside, that there is someone different. I thought I found it. I thought I found you. But I was wrong wasn't I? You told me how you felt, you made me fall for you. And then, there you go, turning away the second there is someone else. What does that mean? What is it suppose to mean? You barely know her, all you see is a pretty face and there you go. I always believed that infront of others, you wear a mask, that infront of me, you could be you. Was it that easy? to forget all about me? Was it that easy, to move on with your life? I always believed that I could change you. That for me, you'd be a different person. A better person. And then again, now I know that I am wrong. and that I always have been and that I always will be. --------------------------------------------------------- Do you wonder? How things would be like if I never said those words I said? Would we still be happy? Would you not have moved on? Like I did? Have you ever spared a second thought on my impossible reasons, yet regret that you never got me to explain it to you? Have you ever thought of me. Of us? Maybe... That's how it's meant to be? Maybe, it shows me what I'm like and what I deserve? Because just maybe, I deserved better...? ---------------------------------------------------------- Do you regret? The way you treated me? Do you regret the things you did. The words you said. Do you regret? When the nights are long and the days are lonely, I do think of you. I think of you in her arms, but tell me. does she kiss the way I do? does it feel the same? does she care for you the way I did? does she give you that same amount of satisfaction? does it sound the same when you call her, when she's half asleep? does it send shivers up and down your spine? I guess at times I do regret. and then I realized... That you're just another chapter of my young life. You're a chapter opened and finished. Now closed. You're a chapter, a page that would always be there... But it's over. We're over... I'm not denying that I do not think of you, and what it could've been. but... I don't regret. Not really. --------------------------------------------------------- When you lie with her do you imagine it is me? When you hold her in your arms, do you feel that burning guilt inside of you, thinking of me? I jolly hope you do. I really really hope you do. Do you remember the words you said to me? Once upon a time, when the stars were shining bright and the night was singing. Do you remember those exact things you said to me? and what my response was? Have you ever wondered, what would've happened if I took that chance? That one leap. Would you still have her in your arms? or would that be me? I was foolish for thinking that even. I was so utterly foolish to think that you would ever see me for me. and not for someone to get rid of that pain and fear. To replace it with guilt and regret. I was so utterly foolish to think that... I could be her I was just so stupid. But then again, I had the will, I had the mind, I had the power. And thank god So maybe... I wasn't that stupid after all. Chances given, yet not taken. I wonder... Who is the winner here? --------------------------------------------------------- I guess this is all my fault. The way things are between us. If I didn't say what I said, if I didn't acted the way I did. I guess things wouldn't be this bad. But. You were part of it. You were part of the blame. If you hadn't said what you did. If you hadn't meant what you meant. Then maybe... Just maybe, things could've worked out? At the same time... I am happy it didn't. Because I just know, deep down I just knew. Knew AND know. that you were never meant for me. That we were never meant to be. So to blame you. Or to thank you. Either way, it's over. So... yeah. I guess that is it. --------------------------------------------------------- Countless of people rush through my head today, as I write each and every word that I had wrote. Or rather, typed. Each, a part of me, a chapter I know that I probably would never forget. But it means something. It tells me something. But what? It's like reading a book in a different language. What does it tell me? Where does this bring me? When... would I find out? I guess everyone has their little inhibitions and everyone has their little twists. I guess everyone has to go through every different kind of situation in life. I guess... so where does this lead me? Where do I stand? I stand right here. With my back straight and my head high. I stand right here. <3Fy -just a little ranting session. xoxo |
whenthelightsgoout
Said I hate you. But I lied.who thought she could own the world who knew love could taste... just so damn sweet too bad it kills you in the end. |
mymanyaddictions
broken and bleeding Jazz daily hero Redz on display Roo true to life Zheng my alternative Fung&&Bi hidden desires Adela a lost conspiracy Nat behind frosted glass Eli under the spotlight Shammie life's gift CS sweet nothings Mel two of a kind Bi truth Cal lose yourself Rico always there Drew all you need to know book reviews ever so thankful for Erica/a> awayfromhome
+ Uhuh... Sure + Leaving + You said you'd be here to hold my handRight up to ... + Epiphany + Thank you, you. for helping me out and everything ... + im trying okay?im fucking tryingso why dont you ju... + Princess in Rags + Yeahuh + knight in shining armour + earth. flight and discovery.why oh why must they c... livingthepast
+ July 2008 + August 2008 + September 2008 + October 2008 + November 2008 + December 2008 + January 2009 + February 2009 + March 2009 + April 2009 + May 2009 + June 2009 + July 2009 + August 2009 + September 2009 + October 2009 + November 2009 + December 2009 + January 2010 + February 2010 + March 2010 + April 2010 + May 2010 + August 2010 + September 2010 + October 2010 + November 2010 + December 2010 + January 2011 + May 2011 + June 2011 + August 2011 + October 2011 takeabow
designer: venomous inspiration: ++ |
screamyourheartout
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