bemyheroine
I'm dancing in the room as I would in the woods with you | ||||||||
I'm waking up, and I see the world again.
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Thursday, July 31, 2008, 11:57 PM
Fallin' by Alicia Keys
I keep on fallin'... in and out of love with you I just realised how much this song... and I have in common. lol.Sometimes I love ya, sometimes you make me blue Sometimes I feel good, At times I feel used Lovin' you darlin', makes me so confused I keep on fallin', in and out of love with you I never loved someone the way that i'm lovin' you Oh Oh, I.... never felt this way How do you give me so much pleasure, cause me so much pain, 'Cause when I think I'm taking more than would a fool I start fallin' back in love with you. I keep on fallin', in and out of love witha you I never loved someone the way that i'm lovin' you <3 fy living in my own little world. Wednesday, July 30, 2008, 9:35 PM
Music To My Ears
Viennese Waltz: Once Upon A December - Anastasia Slow Waltz: Run To You - Whitney Houston Foxtrot: (I cheated on this, I have two =P ) We're In Heaven *slow version* - DJ Sammy Don't Make My Brown Eyes Blue - Crystal Gale Tango: Te Aviso Te Anucio - Shakira Okay, i've yet to find a song for quickstep. I only have one right now, and it sounds okay, but not my type. I'm Sitting On Top Of The World by Al Jouson. lol. <3 dancing like crazy. love it. can't wait till 2morrow. =] xoxofy. , 9:31 PM
Choices.
but the choice is simple. so at least that is the end of that. but am I even in the right state to make that choice? Has everything changed? sigh. <3Fy Tuesday, July 29, 2008, 1:30 AM
Like Water For Chocolate
its comfort food. I have this weird feeling. Something not entirely new, yet foreign. Different. I don't understand it. Maybe you will? I don't honestly know whether I should feel joy. happiness or hurt? It's like I'm depressed. But I don't know what about. That I know I should be happy. But I don't know why I am not. What is going on? I wanna get to know myself. Need to know myself. Through all these deep emotions and cascading feelings. whether inside, am I just someone else? like everybody else? It's like I'm floating on a cloud. These few days, everything seems to pass in a hazy pace. like a dream. yet not. I could just think of yesterday, and feel as though it had not happen, but only within my sleep. Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep. I'm lacking it. Yet I can't seem to be able to. just sleep. thoughts, they run through my head. I can't stop thinking. whats going on within my life? what are the decisions I have to make? The holidays. the past, the memories. their all going. fading away. now it just all feels like a dream. a far away and distant illusion. why? why does this feeling threaten to overcome me? why? <3Fy Monday, July 28, 2008, 1:44 AM
He's HOME!
man i missed him so much! dudeeeeee. <3 <3 <3 real happy now. but to catch up. we're gonna have to sleep pretty damn late. and i have piano 2morrow. =[ damn. sigh. things i do for him. =] as much as i hate to admit. the world seems so dull without him. =P <3fy Saturday, July 26, 2008, 7:53 PM
Memories
here for a moment, gone for the next maybe they are picturesque moments of ones life? or hellish disgust of the daily humanity. remembering... memories that bring forth horror and hurt yet some vanquish to bring better ones forward smile as laughter echo through your mind but frown when you hear the screams. memories... of smiles and laughter, of fun and games of tears and screams, of suffering and torture some would be forever gone but others, engraved forever inside the depth of the mind. i have a memory i would forever remember of long ago scares and despair scars that will linger forever not on the skin but leaving me buried forever of things i wish i never experienced of things i hoped were just nightmares but even as i open my eyes, never disappear always something there to remind me but yet again, i have another of the laughter and happiness that were true of smiles and fun that childish innocence bring forth living through life, hoping to see another day remembering the memories... the wonders of the human mind some i hope to forget forever some i want to treasure till the end <3Fy memories that scar. I know I would never, ever forget it. But it has taught me many things. Of life, of love, of us. Oh the memories. Labels: Poem , 7:22 PM
Dance Day
ill post about my day first then. =] today has been a pretty good day. woke up and went to dance walked up and saw Jon and Yukiko doing the waltz. (it was fucking amazing btw.) they were so gracefulll. twirling around. I've never really saw actual real nice waltz right before my eyes before. and Yukiko was wearing this really pretty dress. and Jon was.. well. Jon. =P (I know you'd probably would read this post. I'm not gonna do anything tor raise your ego. haha not that its not high enough already. =P ) but they were soo amazing. hold on. lemme see whether I can update the video in here. =D okay, no. I cant. dammit. but I do have it in my fone. its so awesome. =D anyway, so we danced a little. etc.etc. then Jane came. which was a surprise (tho not a bad one) cuz I wasnt expecting her to. but it was awesome all the same. so we danced danced went to bestari. and ate. indomee goreng. =D talked talked. etc.etc. haha and went back to dance. THEN only ee came. then we danced again. till like 5. talked talked. 5.30. then went home. =D and Jon was all alone. =[ hopefully, he wasnt too bored. lol. so came home. watched shakespeare. came online now im blogging yup yup. lol. damn. im gonna have dance tomorrow. and again on monday (im not complaining. im actually deliriously happy cuz of dat. =D =D) Nat's birthday this monday. hahaha. you wont believe wat im giving her. but its cute. and somewhat useful. she'll like it. =] <3Fy I miss Bianca. and I miss him. =[ damn. Friday, July 25, 2008, 9:27 PM
Long Retarded Day
one very bad. retarded day. start off. by me only sleeping for 3 damn hours cuz of the friggin mosquitoes in my room. i hate mosquitoes. they piss me off. and then I had a cold. felt extremely sick and knackered. could barely even think straight but i went out anyway. walked round midvalley for bout an hour before Gary came. then we watched a movie etc.etc. things were kinda awkward. cuz he's so introvert and by the time we went to the movies. i had nothing left to say. so an hour after the movie was spent doing nothing. then he went home. my brother was meant to pick me up instead. made me wait for an hour and a half. before he did and i was an hour late to latin. okay, not bad then had a bad dancing day cuz somehow, i guess my mood affected the way i danced. I was so pissed. still pissed. at my brother. oh god. and after latin, we spent half an hour searching for the damn car in the carpark. cuz my smart brother forgot where he parked it. and THEN the car remote stopped working cuz he spammed it by pressing on it too many times. thus we couldnt open the door. and then, he tried using the key. and the alarm starting ringing and we didnt know how to stop it i swear I could've gone deaf. it went on for about another half an hour. before we figured out how to turn the alarm off. by then. my legs were aching, my feet were numb, i was hungry like shit. so we went to safiz to meet the rest of my brothers gang so it was us. my brother. jon. desmond. hanlong. bada. johan. menzie. and me. sigh. if it were any other day. i'd be ecstatic. but im too tired, too hungry, too pissed to care.. another thing that really brought me down was that i was meant to see him today, but i didnt. =[ =[ sigh. this has been one long retarded day. thank god its almost over. <3Fy Labels: Day Thursday, July 24, 2008, 11:23 PM
<3
all this thoughts rushing through my head through my body, my soul when your dancing, the way your moving all they do is watch all I want is more. up against the wall no where to run no where to hide nothing to do but hit it head on the way your body moving it makes me lose my mind lose control. this mounting need this obsession. no, i dont want a piece. i want the whole, the everything. i want you. just spend this one night, this whole night with me. what I wouldnt do. just to have you to taste. to touch. to love. baby its, just us us two. no ones watching. so why not just go crazy and let go? <3 Labels: Poem , 11:20 PM
1000 words of Desire
Tend to go unnoticed. Yet the details are left bare for all to see. From faceless recognitions on a sunny day out, To conversations of burning desire. From the insignificant ramblings of barnyard foul, To the deadly game of love we play. And in the corner, A beautiful girl stands proud and tall, Her grace rivaled only by her will to impress. But her affection is wasted, Met by a wall of cold hard steel. Her passion drives her forward, Yet a solid wall remains. A dance of lust shadows her every move, Whispering maddening intentions, Captivating her attention. And at last she surrenders, Falling prey to the very beast she swore to avoid. Darkness lays claim to the land, Over the hills, the mountains, the red cliffs. A little boy awakens in a far away land, Far from the sufferings of the earth, And upon his bed he sits, He closes his eyes and he is, At peace. No, I did not write this poem. It's written by Andrew. but it IS about me. haha. which i feel so proud about. Drew so sweet. =D thanks dude. <3 you. I think it describes pretty well. hey he knows about my problem. im proud to be his inspiration. lol. aside from the beautiful girl bit. where did you get that lie from drew? hmm. hahaha xoxo ps. thanks again. =] , 11:01 PM
Friends!
so anyway, about today my brother's friends from US are coming over. three of em. that means im stuck in a house with four guys for the next two weeks. whooptidoo. *sarcasm here* not really. that probably just means i cant walk around inappropriately dressed. not that i do anyway. hahaha at also probably means im gonna be wow-ing alot the next two weeks AND that i wont have much privacy. damn. still gotta clean my room. haha anyway, about teh guests. theres bada kang. who is korean. my brother and his friends are leaving to korea in two weeks and staying over at his place. then theres jon. who is philipino. and han long. who is chinese. but they all call him balls. i have no idea why. lol. well. bada i have met. cuz he is here already. but jon and han long (balls) are coming over 2morrow. =D so yeah. mannn. this also means i cant sleep in my brothers room anymore. no more small comfy bed. =[ still feel sick. :0 hate it. heads spinning. =[ but my brotehers feeling alot worse. poor boy. TOLD him not to eat nasi lemak. sigh. loser. but i heart him anyway. =] x , 10:51 PM
dance.
let the beat take you out shivers down your spine let the music take control. ice. move your body your getting stares but you love it anyway ice. lets just go crazy shock 'em. move 'em. leave 'em hangin. ice ice ice. that what their all gonna need. smile, laugh, flirt. you know the control you have over them dive. duck. sway. strut. move like you mean it ice. <3 fy p.s haha. change of pace why dont we? my pathetic attempt at the non-emo poem. =P xoxo Labels: Poem , 8:48 PM
Ugh. No.
feel like sneezing my butt off. *correction, I AM sneezing my butt off. feel like puking. and I just wanna go to sleep. but I can't sleep. cuz all these thoughts wont stop rampaging inside my head. =[ feel so sleepy, tired, weak (not that im ot majority of the time) and I miss him. sigh my brothers leaving back to the US in two weeks. TWO. no more big brother =[ =[ im gonna miss him so much. =[ so so much. no more fei fei. no more ball ball. =[ =[ stupid loser. wanna go study halfway across the world WHYY? =[ cant wait till i grow older and join 'em. think about it, imma gonna be along when siang joins him. that will be in a year. =[ nooo. thats not fairrr. =[ =[ i dont want my fei fei to go. noooo. =[ fei fei's not feeling well too. having stomach aches. told him he shouldnt have ate the nasi lemak but nooo dont listen to me all cuz its 'tasty' idiot. but he is leaving. =[ =[ damn. <3 Wednesday, July 23, 2008, 11:06 PM
Longing.
waiting for you to come home. waiting. always waiting. doing nothing as the time slowly tick by. time time. such a snail paced crawl. all i do is wait and wait. why cant the world be the way i want it to be? why can't there be us? Tuesday, July 22, 2008, 10:00 PM
Day Out
today was pretty damn hilarious. okay, so zheng and i went to cempaka. we went and we saw bei inn, etc. shermay wanted to show me her boyfriend but he was on rubbish pick up duty. (which i found hilarious) =P then i saw henry. who ofcourse, did not recognize me. LOL then i saw sean, who totally brushed me off (but apologized after that) but damn. lol. anyway, moving on. so we walked to the bus stop outside cempaka and THEN we realised we didnt know how to read the bus timetable anyway. so we sat around. wondering what to do. so we went to seven eleven instead. =D bought slurpee's and zheng bout her credit. so incase we get lost later on, we wont die. LOL right, then we walked on randomly. and found ourselves somehwere where we didnt even know where. THANK HEAVENS a taxi just happened to pass by. me (being the smart one =P) waved it down and we got in. and rode off to midvalley. funny thing was during the ride i had to pretend I was on the fone with my mum. so that the taxi driver wont kidnap us or anything (zheng's idea. smart one too =] ) so we got to midvalley, argued over wat to watch (dark knight was our final choice), bought our tickets and went to ZEN to eat *friggin expensive* after that, we went to watch the movie (which was ORGASMIC) the action was awesome. and i cried so much to the end. (if you watched it you will know what i mean) it was just so sad. =[ and bruce wayne is friggin sizzlin. =P after that we wanted to go home. but my brother instead, came tojoin us for dinner with his friends. thus not to make it more awkward we decided to just eat dinner ourselves then join him and hsi friends later on. BUT after we were done. they have not even looked for a restaurant yet. man my brother is picky. LOL soo. in the end. we just decided to send zheng home before they went to muni's to eat. leaving me at home of course. sigh. lol such an interesting day. =P <3 fy ps. i can almost tell my heart isn't into this entry. i wonder why... Labels: Day , 9:27 PM
Bare
to bare what all i have onto the internet just like that? I read once, the key to have a good blog was to bare all you can. everything and anything. but for who to read? up to what extent do you actually portray yourself? a little confused there... oh well... <3Fy , 12:00 PM
At Zheng's Place
listening to stupid girls by Pink. i feel so high. and bored. we'll be heading to cempaka in like 45 minutes. i have the sudden urge to dance. this huge urge. sigh. cant wait till friday. new latin class. damnn. wonder who is taking our class. With micheal and yukiko being gone and all. hmm... about the story. i have no inspiration whatsoever. dont know what to write about. i cant think of plenty of stories, but its just... none of them which i think would hold out for long. meaning i'd probably get bored writing them. sigh. hopefully, we'd get to go and watch batman later on. and hopefully, it'll be as good as they say. where would we be going tho? Midvalley or 1u? hmm. sick of 1u. midvalley seems to be a more inviting choice. then how are we gonna get there? hahaha. public transport. =P according to zheng. taking the bus is fun. fun i tell you. FUN! since when is taking a bus fun?!?!?!? riiight. anyway, I think i should go. don't think it's very courteous to blog in someone else's house. not that she would care anyway. lol <3fy , 12:54 AM
Late
should i update for the umpteenth time of the day? then again, its actually a new day. 1am. haha maybe I should go to bed hmm. i think that might just be a good idea. =D NITE. <3 Monday, July 21, 2008, 11:45 PM
Conversation
†ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :D :D :D †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: LOL im high †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: FUCK †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :D Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: okay, you just laughed then smiled then said you were high then swore then laughed again. Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: remind me how that makes sense. †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: andrew. †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: its me. its fung Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: meh point taken †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: hahahahhaha †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :P:P Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: and why was today gay? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: CUZ I HAD NOTHING TO DO †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: listen to my oh so interesting day †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: woke up at 1.30PM. playe the ps2. ate brunch. played the ps2. played wow. went online. waited for him to come online. got sick waiting. went to play the ps2. ate dinner. read a book. came online †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: THAT is it Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: wow that sucks. Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: are you going anywhere during the hols? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: umm †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: NO †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: milk cows †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: and phuket †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :D Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: milk cows?? Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: when? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: dont know †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: LOL †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: wanna come along? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: ahaahahah †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: PRACTISE Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: to phuket or to milk cows? Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: seriously, i'm confused †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: god. milk cows lar †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: so practise to milk other things in ur fture †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :P †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: ur so innocent †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: hahahaha Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: you probably need the practice more than me fung :) †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: for wat? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: im not lesbiaaan Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: okay we're thinking of two different types of things here lol †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: yes. we are †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: i just realised †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: you mean me being a mommy. haa †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: haha Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: no i meant something probably as equally sick as what you were thinking except on the other end †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: oh. Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: think about it †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: dude. unless ur telling me doing THAT is the same as milking a cow †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: its a bit wrong. †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: HAHAHAHAHA Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: depends on what "THAT" is lol †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: okay †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: haha †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: yes. im a bit confused now Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: think about the action you do to milk cows, then that applies to you †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: ????????? Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: when you have something hanging down from there and you squeeze it to get white stuff out of it, does that apply to you needing practice or me? Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: understand now? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: yes yesyes †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: WAIT †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: ohhh †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: LOL Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: finally †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: yeah ar †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: i was saying that earlier †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: and you said nooo †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: god Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: i think we were both confused lol †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: hahahha †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: YES †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: i agree wtih you Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: that's a first lol †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: HAHA †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: shutup. †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: LOL †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :D Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: :) †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: dude im HIGH †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: IM HIGGGGGHHH Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: very. †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: HIGH IN THE SKYYY †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: LADIDIDIDIDIDIDIDIDI * Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place just sent you a nudge. * †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: and im tyring my best not to laugh my butt off †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :D †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: beedum. beedum. baddum. beedum dum. †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :D Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: go ahead and laugh, it'll help †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: but i dont wannnaaa Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: why not? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: dude. im like. friggin werid rite? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: weird* †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: its like im bipolar Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: yeah you're so weird you managed to spell weird wrong †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: HUSH †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: PUPPIES †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: :D Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: bipolar? you sure it's not schizophrenic? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: friiiiig. i dont know ats wrong with me †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: I DONT SEE PEOPLE †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: i AM PEOPLE †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: I AM YOUR FATHER' †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: hahahahahahahahahahahhahahaha Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: that would be really scary Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: i mean, my father's a girl? what the heck? †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: and the same age as you? Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: 2 months older but yeah Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: if you were my father that means i've had two stepmothers before Andrew Chin-I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place says: who happened to be guys †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: hahahahahaha †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: yup †ғy - the.little.strands.of.thoughts. says: wonder which one is your mom SEE? hahaha talk about hilarious xoxo. Fy , 11:07 PM
1000 words
I know you're hiding things, using gentle words to shelter me. Your words were like a dream, but dreams could never fool me. Not that easily. I acted so distant, didn't say goodbye before you left. But I was listening. You'll fight your battles far from me, far too easily. 'Save your tears cause I'll come back." I could hear that you whispered as you walked through that door. But still I soar, to hide the pain as I turn back the pages. Shouting might've been the answer. What if I cried out my eyes and begged you not to depart? But now I'm not afraid to see whats in my heart. Cause 1,000 words called out through the ages. They'll fly to you, even though I can't see. I know their reaching you, suspended on silver wings. Oh 1,000 words, 1,000 embraces. They'll craddle you and all of your weary. They seem far away. They'll hold you forever. Oh 1,000 words (1,000 words) have never been spoken. (oh) They'll fly to you and carry you home. (Carry you home!) And back into my arms. Suspended on silver wings! (On silver wings!) And 1,000 words called out through the ages. They'll craddle you. No more lonely days. (Lonely days) They'll hold you forever. Oh 1,000 words... Personally, I love this song. It's original is in Japanese, which makes it sound all the more better. <3> , 10:55 PM
Desire
burn from desire, longing. what if I told you that I'd sit everyday infront of my computer waiting for you to come online although you never do that everytime I receive a sms. i would pray and hope that it was from you although it never was. what if I told you that I find it hard to breathe. everytime I think of you that my emotions they tumble and turn what if I told you that every word you say to me I assess for hours. to see if this feeling would ever be returned my heart jumping, quickening at the slight chance that there is yet breaking and hurting when I know that there isn't This false hope. it hurts. yet I am still so confused. I dont know what is right, yet what is wrong. Is this really me? is this what i need, what my heart wants or is it just my heart trying to heal once again? <3 , 8:26 PM
Beginning
Talk about a majorly long post. DUDE. i have NOTHING to do with my life now. so what should I do? Maybe I'll start on a story. Hmm. That could be interesting. =D think I'll go start on that now. =D x , 6:25 PM
Religion
My thoughts on it? Lets see. beware. do not read if you are a huge believer of god or if you are easily offended. Plainly and simply, I'm an atheist. I think this whole God thing, is just a bunch of BS no offence. I respect people's religion, their beliefs, I do not judge just because someone is christian or anything, nor do I try to convince them otherwise. My judgement is my own, so please do not get offended nor get angry at me. It's just how I think. Okay, so WHY do I think its a bunch of BS? Well, cuz looking at this world today. Suffering, starvation, death, illness. You ask yourself is there really a god out there who would stand by and watch? Sure you say, it's not god's fault, its ours. Us, humans, all evil deeds done by our very own hands. That is very true, but isnt God the one who created us? isn't he the one that crafted out brain, into functioning the way that he intended us to? Who is he? to stand by and judge us? to say whether we are to go to heaven or hell? to suffer for eternity or be in safe haven? No one can judge, nor change ourselves but ourselves. Okay, you may then say they deserved it, they must've done something in their past life or before to deserve such punishment. Not true. Do you think the whole of Africa has sinned? What is a sin again? Lust. Greed. Gluttony. Sloth. Wrath. Envy and Pride. are those sins? tell me, which single human being on this entire earth has not felt all seven of them. Does that mean we're all doomed to go to hell? Lust. if you look at it one way, it's bad. but what's love without lust? Greed. greed, well, It's pretty much self explanatory. We greed, we want things, but that is what help us strive forward. Gluttony. Anyone hungry? Sloth. Well, I'm a major victim to this sin. im like the largest sloth I know. But doesnt everybody want to sit down and relax once in a while? Wrath. Anger. yeah. right. Envy. It's nearly the same as greed. Envy keeps us moving forward. and Pride. Since when did pride become a bad thing? Pride is what everyone has. You say too much of it. But isn't too much of everything bad anyway? So where did is its origin? Okay, plainly, I really doubt the bible, it is after all written like how many years after the peroid of Jesus. and all by the same people who seems to always have the same names. To me, I just think. Someone out there. Someone really smart came up with this thing called god. Just to give people hope you know? When you're down and you dont think you'd survive through the day. You pray to god just to have that slight sliver of hope. I do the same. although I know there is no higher being up there. I don't know. You just feel hope I guess. That maybe, just maybe there is a higher being up there listening down to you. And if the day turned out better. You'd thank him. but if it turns out worse. What happens? You just think, maybe tomorrow. WEll, yeah, the days BOUND to get better anyway right? because nothign ever sucks for that long period of time. Miracles. I don't believe in miracles. Okay, I do. I believe they happen But I don't believe its given by some higher being. and a last thing I find sorta... funny about religion. Im speaking plainly for Christianity now, because it's the only one I know. I'm unsure about buddism and the rest, but Christianity. Adam and Eve. oh god. this i find weird. Arent they the first two on earth? and didnt they have two sons? hello. what happened there? >.< okay, that wasn't my intended point in the first place. It just slipped. Anyway. I personally believe that there are other species out there. In space. Think about it. We are one planet of nine on one solar system. Each solar system has a sun. Each sun is a star. How many stars are there out there you think? We are only one of the tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny bit of this galaxy and dont get me started about alternate dimensions. parallel and not. In the bible, it says that god created this world, (out of thin air?) and then placed water, earth, animals, and STARS in the sky. adn then humans how could he have placed STARS in the sky for gods sake. (no pun intended) AND in the bible. it says god had created it. how are the people in the bible meant to know? its not like they were THERE. okay, maybe there was a messiah, Jesus Christ and all. That maybe I believe, turning water into wine, etc.etc. But the whole him being God' sun is a little far fetched. even for me So to conclude. maybe there is a higher being out there. Smarter, more intelligent then us. Maybe we are all just part of an experiment done by another. But i do not believe that there is a god who created us. humans and earth. <3Fy , 6:19 PM
Lethargic
Another 6 weeks of being bored outta my brains Of doing nothing cuz I'm not allowed to go out too often Of feeling so dam lethargic and tired all the time. I hate being this way. When I just have nothing to do with my life ESPECIALLY, now that I have time. The only thing I can think of is. him Im confused. Do I like him? do i not? or am I just attracted? I feel as though just the prospect of him is attracting me. But would I actually want to get into something with him? I dont know. How do I find an answer to this question? =[ so what do I do now? sigh. on the bright side, I get to see Zheng tomorrow. I have not seen her in forever. and i miss her so much. =[ i really do. We have so much to talk about, so much to say to apologize for. at least on my part. I hope things'll turn out okay, hopefully. then now all we can do is hope and pray. <3 fy Sunday, July 20, 2008, 6:17 PM
by the time you read this
Lola Jaye Genre: Inspirational, Love, Romance Rating: 6 outta 10 Comments: A little draggy, but interesting all the same. The advice given by the father is very inspirational. A good book. Sypnosis: Lois Bates, a fresh, bright girl of the age 12. Not yet a teenager, but no longer a child. Her eyes just newly opened to the world beyond her mothers empty home. Since the age of five, fatherless. Now at this ripe age of 12, she is going through what many have before, her mother's remarriage, a new father. At her mothers wedding, Lois finds herself handed a manual written by her late father by his sister. Her aunt told her that this manual was written by her fathers own hand, at the time near of his death. Reading each entry on her birthday as instructed. His advice guided her through every stage of her life - From first love and relationships to her career. Through his words Lois learns to start living again, and discover the happiness is waiting round the corner. p.s. how was that for a first try? Labels: Reviews , 6:15 PM
Book Reviews
Wouldn't that be awesome. Lets start now. Labels: Reviews , 4:37 PM
Quick. Quick. Slow. Slow
Dancing was awesome. Standard. Its such a magical dance. The teamwork between you and your partner your connection. the way you just feel how he moves and you move along. Tango's really awesome for that. He just moves you anyway he wants. And you follow It's truly that simple. okay, second thought, maybe not THAT simple, but its fun. adn its pretty awesome. quick. quick. slow. slow. lock step. slow. slow. stop. slow. slow. brush tap. slow. slow. side step. slow. slow. haha it was awesome. quick step is pretty dam fun too. teaching ee to dance it was hilarious. Jon just kept calling us grasshoppers. hahaha Waltz was craaazie. We barely even knew that steps and spent half the time arguin about it. But it was fun. It should happen more often. haha Owh man, and trying to dance the chacha. KEPT getting the fan wrong. LOL BUT i had a great time. =] I'm going to go to Gardens later, to watch this movie called red cliff. It's a chinese movie. Watching it with my family. =] but it'll be pretty late. 9.45. i hope i wouldnt fall asleep. =[ anyway, will update soon. ciao ciao <3 Fy Labels: Day Saturday, July 19, 2008, 5:54 PM
No Limits
the past? would you want to? what if there were a chance? a chance to erase everything? bad. and good? would you? would you erase everything just for a peace of mind? to reach that state of tranquility the one that you had as a child the one that you wanted to get out off? so eager to grow up so eager to live and not learn so eager. and when the day comes would you regret? <3Fy |
whenthelightsgoout
Said I hate you. But I lied.who thought she could own the world who knew love could taste... just so damn sweet too bad it kills you in the end. |
mymanyaddictions
broken and bleeding Jazz daily hero Redz on display Roo true to life Zheng my alternative Fung&&Bi hidden desires Adela a lost conspiracy Nat behind frosted glass Eli under the spotlight Shammie life's gift CS sweet nothings Mel two of a kind Bi truth Cal lose yourself Rico always there Drew all you need to know book reviews ever so thankful for Erica/a> awayfromhome
+ I realize that I can use this blog like a timeline... + Hello blogger.Hello myself.It's been a while since... + I feel sick,are my grievances for nought?It is the... + All Your Love + I am here quietly crying out in pain;will you save... + The Trap + I still see you fucking her in my brain. I'm sorry... + So today was day two. How did it go? Not very well... + Losing you is going to be more painful than anythi... + Well, this situation certainly calls for an:EFFEEH... livingthepast
+ July 2008 + August 2008 + September 2008 + October 2008 + November 2008 + December 2008 + January 2009 + February 2009 + March 2009 + April 2009 + May 2009 + June 2009 + July 2009 + August 2009 + September 2009 + October 2009 + November 2009 + December 2009 + January 2010 + February 2010 + March 2010 + April 2010 + May 2010 + August 2010 + September 2010 + October 2010 + November 2010 + December 2010 + January 2011 + May 2011 + June 2011 + August 2011 + October 2011 takeabow
designer: venomous inspiration: ++ |
screamyourheartout
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